Jack the Cucumber was a Christian.
In the vegetable buckets at the green grocer, Jack would try damn, damn hard to evangelise to the other cucumbers (and also some of the neighbouring capsicums).
This annoyed them all and they wanted Jack to just shut up with his self-righteous religious rantings and leave them in peace.
One day, a Bad Lady came to the green grocers and picked Jack up, inspected him and then purchased him (along with a punnet of strawberries, which are incidental to this story).
All the other vegetables were relieved Jack had finally gone.
They would have been even happier to know that the Bad Lady took Jack home and masturbated her vagina with him all the time.
The end.
