Elsie Malone had an itch in her No-No place.
She got it in Galway (in the Republic of Ireland) from an older fellow named Theodore Malone (no relative of Elsie's, just an amazing surname coincidence).
Theodore was a Professor of Psychology at NUI and also a hobbyist hand-darter.
Elsie scratched at her itch so hard that sometimes she thought she might dig her way to China.
She never made it to China in the end, but always liked looking at pictures of it.
The end.
